A Sharp ReDuke!

It would be hard to remake The Dukes of Hazzard today, because much of the iconography of the classic TV series is evocative of the racist past of the American South.

I think I’ve hit upon a solution: move the story to England!

It will be called “The Dukes of Hampshire.” Beau and Lucas are actual dukes, and their cousin Margaret’s denim shorts are neatly hemmed and creased.

Their car is still a Dodge Charger. But the steering wheel is on the right, obvi, and instead of being named General Lee, it’s called Field Marshal Montgomery. A Union Jack is painted on the roof.

A constant thorn in the Dukes’ side, despite their “never intending any distress,” is Council Leader Hogg and his crony, Police Constable Coltrane.

The theme music’s lyrics, rather than calling the young troublemakers “good ole boys,” describes them as “right jolly chaps.”

You may all thank me in the comments.


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